“Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands . . . so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” I Thessalonians 4:11-12 NIV
I have branded this verse in my heart and mind. It is my ambition to live a quiet life, and God’s Grace has enabled me to do that when I depend on Him. The King James Bible reads, “Study to be quiet”. In a sense the King James Version says more than the NIV rendering of “ambition”, as the word “study” implies concentrated mental effort. It’s natural to blither and gab, especially for women. We need to study hard, and make a huge effort to be quiet.
It seems that many contemporary Americans have lost even the foggiest notion of how to live quietly without a focus on personal agendas, problems, and what they consider to be “stress”. Some people believe there is more stress now than in former years. How strange! My grandparents and parents lived through two World Wars and the Great Depression, yet I never heard them complain of “stress”. Indeed, I think they would have scoffed at this self-centered generation of people who believe in verbally processing every bump and grind of what we simply used to call “life”.
Of course “living quietly” does not mean abstinence from conversation. Certainly adults as well as children need lighthearted times of joking, laughing, and even being downright silly. Wholesome comedy is one of God’s great gifts. Refreshing conversation reflects joy and a merry heart. Soul rich conversation—based on books, the fine arts, hobbies, and special interests—is always rewarding and welcome. Meaty discussions of ideas are stimulating, and more precious than gold! Any talk which stretches the mind or imagination is infinitely valuable to all involved.
There even may be occasional times when we need to share a problem, or verbally process a concern with an understanding friend or family member. But there is neither value nor virtue in habitually talking about problems to anyone other than the Lord—who is always eager and available to listen! The person who talks of nothing but her problems, and how “busy” she is, makes for boring conversation which could potentially drive a thoughtful person stark raving nuts!
Solitude! Quietness! These qualities are frowned on today, when such a high premium is placed on undiscerning and endless verbal communication. Society deems excessive noise and activity as a perfectly normal state—while the person who thrives on quality conversation (which springs from quiet reflection and creative solitude) is sometimes considered “odd”!
In too many lives cell phones and chronic, mindless chatter have supplanted the art of thinking! Too often, conversation centers on talk about people: who they are, what they are doing, where they are going, etc. Those of us who value a calm, reflective lifestyle, are decimated to a jelly by the “people talkers” who move their mouths ad nauseum.
The writer of Ecclesiastes states God’s balance in human affairs: “There is a time for everything . . . a time to be silent and a time to speak . . . .” I’m thankful that God’s Word underscores what I know in my soul to be right! As much as I like to talk, I desire first of all to “live a quiet life”. Edifying conversation can only flow from a heart attitude of quiet inner depth and serenity.
Margaret L. Been, ©2011
Note: This entry is a version of one I posted in 2010 in my Grace with Salt blog. That entry has received a huge number of viewers, along with other entries on http://gracewithsalt.wordpress.com/ about compulsive talkers and toxic people. The ongoing interest in these topics indicates that many of us have issues with individuals who wear us to a jelly. For that reason, I plan to reprint more of the topical pieces on this site.
Sadly enough, occasionally the insensitive and exhausting people are fellow believers! We want to be loving and accepting, yet we can be dragged down by those who take unfair advantage of our patience and tolerance. It helps each of us to realize that we are not alone—and that there are Biblical principles supporting our desire for a quiet lifestyle with depth of content! MLB
